Scars Read online

  Scars

  by

  Dale Mayer

  Some scars are visible…

  Some scars are hidden…

  The worst scars are buried deep inside…

  Robin and Sean are existing in their private worlds. Hiding in plain sight, not really living, definitely not thriving. They both need to move forward… if they can.

  Yet the price of success is pain as they confront issues that have plagued them for years. They’re so different, with such opposite problems. Yet they complement each other – or at least they will, if they can work through their issues and find each other.

  This is a story of pain and sorrow, joy and success… and… love.

  Books in This Series:

  Skin

  Scars

  Scales – Coming Soon

  SCARS

  Dale Mayer

  Valley Publishing

  This is a work of fiction. Names, characters, places and incidences either are the product of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously, and any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, business establishments, events or locales is entirely coincidental.

  Copyright © 2015 Dale Mayer

  All rights reserved.

  ISBN: 978-1-928122-38-8

  License Notes

  This ebook is licensed for your personal enjoyment only. This ebook may not be re-sold or given away to other people. If you would like to share this book with another person, please purchase an additional copy for each recipient. If you’re reading this book and did not purchase it, or it was not purchased for your use only, then please return it and purchase your own copy. Thank you for respecting the hard work of this author.

  Praise for Dale Mayer

  I love to read Dale Mayer’s books… keeps me guessing…. I am getting good though trying to figure out who did it…. I am on my fourth book….

  …Review left on Vampire in Deceit, book 4 of Family Blood Ties

  Dale Mayer’s work is always outstanding and Haunted by Death is no exception.

  …Review from Haunted by Death, book 2 of the By Death Series

  This is a GREAT series that you don’t want to miss out on!

  …Review from Broken Protocols Series

  This is my favorite author I enjoy all her books and I can’t wait for more… her books are easy to get into and I love the storyline

  …Review from Dangerous Designs, book 1 of the Design Series

  Dale Mayer is a gifted writer who now has me hooked as a new fan. She characters are complex and she shares her knowledge of energy work clearly and simply. Makes for fascinating reading…

  …Review from Rare Find, book 6 of Psychic Visions Series

  Don’t underestimated Dale Mayer. Combination of JD Robb and Heather Graham. Paranormal suspense………

  …Review left on Maddy’s Floor, book 3 of the Psychic Visions Series

  Wow! I read a lot, and I can honestly say that there a few books that I have read that I will remember for years. This is one of those books. Thank you Dale for giving me the gift of this magnificent story. It was both heartbreaking and hopeful at the same time.

  …Review left on Skin, book 1 of Broken and yet…Healing Series

  Touched by Death is an outstanding novel by Dale Mayer. Unlike her usual novels that contain paranormal activity, this novel is sheer malevolent actions from ordinary humans.

  …Review left on Touched by Death, book 1 of By Death Series

  Dale’s books are spellbinding in more ways than one. She has a unique way with words. Her characters are fun and funny and loving. I love the way the story flows. Her characters all have personality. She takes you from suspense to love, then fear love and eternal love.

  …Review left on Second Chances, book 1 of Second Chances… at Love Series

  Table of Contents

  Title Page

  About the Book

  Copyright Page

  Praise for Dale Mayer

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Author’s Note

  Previews

  Second Chances Sample

  Touched by Death Sample

  About the Author

  Also by Dale Mayer

  Chapter 1

  Robin Childers waited at the side of the small conference room, her stomach in knots, her palms sweating. She did that a lot these days. Wait. Wait for the days to pass. Wait for the months to pass. Wait for time between her surgeries to pass.

  To the next surgery she didn’t want. Another surgery she had to have – or stay a freak that scared little children and caused horrified stares wherever she went.

  Not the life she’d planned.

  Not the life she’d imagined for herself.

  Not the life she’d wanted.

  But it was the life she was currently living. And that sucked.

  Big time.

  While watching the other participants enter, she had to acknowledge she wasn’t alone in not liking her life.

  Everyone appeared to be walking to death row. Here because of outside influences, because other people wanted them to attend. Or maybe here because they understood that they needed to be – yet hating the necessity that forced them to take this step. And yet they still came. Because they needed this.

  Everyone was here for whatever magic their instructor psychologist / therapist, Professor Jenna Komak, had to offer.

  In other words, they were all desperate.

  To heal. To ditch the ugly in their lives. To find a way to live a ‘normal’ life – whatever that meant.

  It was an odd thing to realize that she’d signed up for this on her own. Empowering. No one had pressured her to come. No one had paid the heavy fees for her. One brave morning, she’d determined that this was the next step in her journey, and she’d taken it.

  She’d even managed to stay positive right up until it was time to leave for the workshop. Then reality hit her. Not only was she going to a seminar to help her deal with a painful issue, she was going to have to leave the university campus where she lived and travel to a hotel in downtown Vancouver. Be out in public. Deal with strangers.

  At least at the university, people were used to seeing her. They stared, but less and less as they became accustomed to her face. Yet to do this workshop, she’d have to leave her hidey hole and journey out there – a place she’d hidden from as hard and as long as she could.

  It had been easy to push the anxiety into a small hole in her stomach as she dreamed of the promise of finally getting the help she needed. That hope had kept her going. Now that she’d arrived, her gut in knots, her palms sweaty just from the thought of what she was doing. Doubts plagued her.

  Damn. She was an idiot. A masochist. Maybe she needed her head examined after all. Something Jenna was sure to do. And that was pretty scary. Robin had issues. Duh.

  Sure, everyone did. One of hers – the big one – she wore for the entire world to see. All other issues stemmed from there. Although if she were honest and more self-aware, she could
probably find issues from her past at the root of this, too. But she had no plans to do that. She was here to deal with a specific issue. Not to try and deal with them all. There were too many. They hurt too much.

  No. If she could deal with one issue, then she could return to a more normal life. The rest of her issues would have to wait until later. Much later.

  It was her reaction – and other people’s reactions to her face – that terrified her. And therein lay the problem.

  She had to get over herself.

  And that was a shitty deal.

  Hating the inside shakiness threatening to take over the rest of her long frame, Robin turned to watch the other participants amble in to take their places. Her glance strayed past then caught on her friend Tania sitting silent at her side.

  “Hey,” Tania said, nervously.

  She was just as nervous, maybe more so, but just as determined as Robin to move on in life. Only Tania’s scars were inside. Hidden from the world. Private. She had the discretion to share on her time frame.

  “Are you sure you’re okay?” Robin asked her, studying her friend’s face in concern.

  Tania shrugged. “I’m fine.”

  Robin heard the tremor in Tania’s voice, and then there was likely a matching one in hers.

  The two of them were a mess.

  Just then, Dr. Jenna Komak walked in.

  And the class tension eased back. That woman exuded a presence. Calm. Capable. Caring.

  She knew them all individually and they all knew her. Everyone here had attended evening classes with her and had been vetted and approved to take this special workshop. Most of them were students from the same university. But not all. They were a mix of men and women.

  Yet there was a common denominator – they were all damaged.

  *

  Sean Wilson slouched in the back of the room. Separate from the others. Like he’d always been. He still questioned his sister’s request. By rights, if he was here, Paris should be as well. And she’d wanted to come but had been refused, with a gentle suggestion to wait for another session a few months down the road. Maybe she’d be ready then.

  Disappointed, Paris had then asked Sean to apply and if he got accepted, to scope it out for her. See if it would help her. He’d expected to be rejected even faster than Paris had been, so Sean had applied. And been accepted.

  Paris had been overjoyed for him. Sean had been terrified. It was so not what he wanted. He didn’t want to listen to other people’s problems. He didn’t want to share his own. He’d done a lot already. Was studying psychology to help him understand more. But that was on his time frame. Not here. Not now. Not surrounded by strangers. Who would want this? But there was no backing out now. He wouldn’t be able to. Not and still face his sister.

  Now he was here in the hotel, stuck, and likely to be spending a week in very uncomfortable situations trying to be polite in the group therapy sessions that rubbed him the wrong way. He’d been in those before. They were not fun.

  He had no wish to have this prof dig around in his head. Regardless of the prof’s cool confidence in her ability to help everyone.

  He barely stifled back a snort at that thought. Looking up, he realized several people were staring at him. So okay, he hadn’t been as silent as he thought he’d been.

  “What?” he asked the Goth-looking woman in front of him, giving her his bland face – willing her to say something.

  The woman raised an eyebrow then smirked as if seeing something he hadn’t expected her to see before turning away.

  Damn right. He slouched back, stretched his long legs out in front of him and crossed his arms across his chest.

  Sean had never backed down from a fight in his life. And had never apologized. He wasn’t about to start now. Maybe he’d have saved himself a lot of pain if he’d learned that lesson as a child. Then again, he’d never been a fast learner. Besides, Paris was and it hadn’t helped her any. She was the one that should be here. Damn. Why had Jenna thought Paris wasn’t ready? And yet Jenna thought Sean was?

  Although he hadn’t come for help, or planned on being helped, there was room for it. His life was a mess of sleepless nights, bad nightmares during the few moments of shuteye he did get, followed by slow, dragging-his-ass days as he pulled himself through the daily requirements of being a human being on this planet.

  Something he’d looked at cutting short a time or two. But not since becoming an adult.

  And it was due to his sister that he hadn’t completed the job. He might not be worth saving – but she was. She’d needed him to get that job done.

  At least that’s what he told himself. And none of it changed the fact that he was empty inside. Filled with pain and sorrow. He lived in the shadows. Alone. He looked normal to everyone else – calm as if he lived in the light.

  Except there was no light in his soul. Just darkness.

  And now he was in a seminar geared to drain some of that darkness away. But what if that darkness did disappear? And there was nothing left inside?

  Chapter 2

  Given that last night had been the introduction to the workshop, along with an overview of what would take place this week in general terms, Robin knew today would be a case of getting down to business.

  Especially now. The morning break was already over. Now there was a sense of waiting. Expectation. She glanced over at Tania to see her gaze locked on Jenna’s face. They’d all hear about the special project Jenna had designed for each of them. That could go either way. Robin preferred to work alone. Although it would be fine to work with Tania, as she already understood Robin’s issues and she was one of the few who understood some of Tania’s.

  Jenna had a stack of papers in front of her on a clipboard. Notes of some kind. Jenna didn’t waste any time welcoming the group back. As if understanding that Jenna had shifted gears, several people sat straight up.

  Robin slid lower in her seat.

  “All right. We’re going to start with the assignment that you will each do during the week.”

  She listened as Jenna outlined a weeklong project everyone would have to complete during their stay here. As she heard the general details, Robin couldn’t help but feel a huge sense of relief inside. She lowered her gaze in case Jenna caught a glimpse of that look in her eyes. If Jenna saw, she’d change Robin’s assignment. No one was allowed to be too comfortable – not in a workshop like this.

  Still, she couldn’t help but wonder what possible project she’d be called to do. School was easy for her, so a report didn’t worry her. The project would also help her get through the week. Something to focus on so she could ignore the others. If she had to, she could even present it to this class. After all, here they were all equals. And all broken.

  “I understand there could be some resistance to the individual assignments.”

  A ripple worked its way around the small seminar room.

  A knowing smile slipped across Jenna’s beautiful face. “Given that, I suggest you remember why you are here. What you hope to get out of this week, and keep in mind that you all came to me and in everyone’s case…” she stopped to look each participant in the eye then continued, “I have evaluated your situation and came up with what I believe is the best way forward for each of you.” She smiled, her gaze whispering back across their faces. “So remember that when you hear what I have planned.”

  Robin sat back and swallowed. Hard. Oh Lord. She wanted this to be a simple, school report type of project, but her gut said she wouldn’t be so lucky.

  And she wasn’t.

  “We’ll start with Sean,” Jenna said. “Please come to the back of the room with me and I can go over your assignment.” Jenna looked down at the document in her hand and nodded once. She glanced up and pinned Robin in place. “Robin, you too. You’ll be working with Sean.”

  Ah hell. So much for working with Tania. Or for working alone. She glanced over at Sean. She’d recognized the look in his eye earlier. He didn’t want anyt
hing to do with this workshop. She had no idea why he was here, but it wasn’t to heal. But from the look of him, he needed to do that very badly.

  *

  Surprised to hear his name called first, Sean stood up and shoved his chair back out of the way. The beautiful professor motioned to the back of the room, presumably to discuss his project. Here went nothing.

  Why was he here again? Still, it was just a project. He was already here, so what the hell. At least he’d be able to report back to Paris. He wondered what the project was. As he started weaving through the tables and chairs to the back of the room, he heard Jenna call out a second name as his partner. Partner? These were individual assignments – weren’t they? Had he missed something? He hoped so. Teamwork was something he did well at school, at work. In his personal life – not so much. Sure, this was a category altogether – but there was no doubt this was damn personal. He was a loner. And that was by choice.

  As Robin walked past him, he remembered her from last night, where she’d spent the better part of the ‘getting to know everyone’ session sitting in a corner and making it plain she had no intention of getting to know anyone. He understood that. He felt the same way but so far this morning, her attitude hadn’t improved. If anything, from that slight curl of her lip, she’d taken a turn for the worse. She had stunning black hair that hung down straight over one side of her face so it appeared that she could only see half her world. Her hair was black and her skin cream, and it reminded him of a black and white personality.

  Too bad for her.

  Well, he could deal with whatever. This was only for a week. He’d tolerated much worse for much longer.

  How hard could this be?

  Chapter 3

  Needing her air of indifference to hide the inner turmoil, Robin sat down at the chair that Jenna indicated and crossed her legs. She waited. Sean sauntered over like he didn’t give a damn. He probably didn’t. With his attitude, Robin had no idea why he was here in the first place. He was odd. Tall and slim with wide shoulders and slim hips. He was built for gentlemen suits and wore jeans with more holes than material. It was that cocky “screw you” look on his face that she couldn’t stop watching.